1. Yes. I felt like I was being held back by some sort of invisible force while there. That invisible force is called being defined by people who define you as whatever they wish to. It doesn't even have to be bad, it is still limiting.

  2. Wow I %100 agree w all of this. I'm still trying to move out of my shithole. It's hard to get a company on the other side of the country to hire you before you go out there.

  3. When you moved, did you feel a big change in your self worth and your overall attitude/ positivity to life? Even if you moved not knowing anyone there? Just out of interest, your reply to the post has really got me thinking as I completely agree with the invisible force and have felt it for some time now. Cheers king ❤️

  4. I’m actually in the minority a bit. I moved away at 17 because I had joined the military. When I left and came back, I moved to the city for both college and job prospects. I spent 4 years there and it honestly wasn’t a great experience. The traffic was terrible, everyone always had a problem, and my car was broken into multiple times.

  5. Pretty much in the same boat aside from the military background. The big city is horrible, I desperately want to move back home at some point.

  6. Hell yeah. No intention of ever going back. I was young and stupid there, into bad habits with an established circle of friends. I would be dead by now if I didn't move away.

  7. Not really. I spent majority of my life in my home town and it's very important place for me where I have a lot of memories. My heart will always be there.

  8. Absolutely. I left when I was 18 and never looked back. I feel bad for the people i knew before I left that are still there. Their lives seem so uninteresting. Almost all of them are miserable and have just stayed stuck at the maturity level they were when I left. Many still work at the same retail stores they worked at in high school. I feel like many of them would have made something of their life if they left. They don't realize what they've missed. To quote Trixie Mattel's song Little Sister "I know that you think you're growing but you're just tall."

  9. This isn't an attack on you personally, but it frustrates me to hear this. I have severe anxiety attacks whenever I get a new job, so as a result I'm still stuck with my parents in my late 20s. Thankfully I got engaged recently and my fiancee is saving up so we can travel. He works with concrete though so he almost never gets work this time of year.

  10. Yes and no, moved across the country and started fresh and felt like I could be whoever I wanted to be and start over but ultimately missed my close friends and family who were all back home so I wound up moving back.

  11. Yeah dude, moving across the state was the only thing that made me realize I was depressed. In my hometown, I just put my head down and kept going but once it moved I had a chance to look up and notice what was going on with my self.

  12. It improves because at first is so bad and hard that once you like it and get used to the new sorrounding, you love it.

  13. Moved two states away the day after I graduated high school. I only go back for funerals. It’s been 30+ years of no regrets

  14. I’m moving out in a year or so, and this post has given me a lot of hope, thanks for re-assuring me guys <3

  15. Yes. It gives you a chance to re-invent yourself, away from whatever persona you had (or were assigned) in high school. You don't have to be the jock, the nerd, the weirdo, the princess, the stoner (or any other member of The Breakfast Club.)

  16. I do! Moving out of town saved my life. If I hadn't left, I would probably be in jail for selling drugs or something.

  17. Absolutely, I couldn't believe it. I'm a tall woman and I was treated as a freak. Turns out I'm ok - unusual, yes, but ok.

  18. I think most people would agree with this. Going off alone to a new place really makes you learn how to fend for yourself and gives you heaps of freedom to explore.

  19. I moved away for university and my life got better and better, then I came home after I finished university and got a job and feel like I’m back into the rut I’d managed to pull myself out of.

  20. Leaving those insane people called my family of origin and never talking to them again now going on 40 years? Hell yes!

  21. Omg yes. It was a normal thing to get all hopped up on meth and poverty was huge. Since leaving I've been clean since 2004 and found a career that would have never been possible in my hometown.

  22. Yup, stayed there so long because it was close to family and the mortgage was cheap and I could afford to travel a lot. I realised I loved travelling so much because my home town truly awful. So we bought a house in a new town its safer, I've made so many new friends, family visit more, lots more space and it suits our lifestyle much better.

  23. I live in the house I was raised in. I bought it in 2018. I've lived here for 30 years, it's filled with so many terrible alcoholic memories of my parents no matter how much we change it. We're moving away at the end of the year. I can't wait.

  24. Been stuck in mine almost 30 years. My mom keeps me here. But I long to see other places and live in a more diverse area. Sucks to do what’s expected of me

  25. I made a big move from my small rural town in Ireland to Beijing. It was a scary move at first, but 6 years later it's hands down the best decision of my life!

  26. mine did 110% improve after moving away from my hometown. I have no intentions on going back outside for visiting family and even then it will be a drop by and leave. It was a depressing place, horrible air quality, shitty people, and too much love of pro sports as an identity.

  27. 100%… small-ish. Lots of old money passed down gen to gen. Lots of rich kids, place was completely toxic and still is. I have 2 friends from there I keep in touch with. It took moving away to realize that all of society doesn’t operate the same as that shit hole.

  28. Had to move back to my hometown shortly because of covid. Hated it. Felt like all the personal growth I had made over the years evaporated overnight. It was soul crushing.

  29. Yes Napa sucks and is to expensive to live for the average person and I have always been average. Yet here average is doable and even happier.

  30. Moving away from your hometown (especially after university) is an absolutely life hack in my opinion! I moved from a regional city in the midlands to Scotland in my late 20s with my long term partner and it has been really great in so many ways. 10/10 would recommend!

  31. Hoping this can be me in the coming years. I'm not exactly miserable here but as another comment put it, there are invisible forces preventing me from being my best self.

  32. Yes - I was born in San Francisco and lived in the suburbs just outside the city. In my early 30s, I returned and got into some really bad stuff.

  33. Abso-fucking-lutely. You are defined completely by your past. When you’re young, you sometimes do or say things you regret. The shitty thing about living in one town into adulthood is that there is always someone willing to remind you.

  34. I stayed in my home town for 46yrs, last year I moved to the coast and I have never been happier, 5min walk to beach, 5 min walk to the shops. I feel like I belong here, I take part in community events, made new friends in shops etc, keep thinking why did it take so long.

  35. absolutely. when i visit, it feels like there’s a black cloud hovering over me. you couldn’t pay me to move back there.

  36. 10000% I realized pretty young that I wanted more for myself than that town could give me and I’m so grateful to have made that step

  37. Yes. I don't think my hometown is the worst place, but it's not a place that offers the kind of personal growth or lifestyle that I want. A significant part of that is the people there. You can't become who you want to be if everyone around you has already decided who you are.

  38. Funny thing, it seems like when you move away from your hometown and you start to get into who you actually are as an adult everything becomes better. And then you go back home to see the same people that you left doing the same stuff… Not elevating! I would never go back!

  39. Yes indeed. My hometown was a nice place to live decades ago, but has in recent years fallen under the control if right wing politicians, who have seriously degraded the town's quality of life. Have now moved to a different continent, where things are still civil and public spirited.

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