1. This last paragraph.....i told my husband i wanted a divorce after #2. I was tired of working full time and doing the lions share of household duties, figured I would be better off losing the third grown, sulky teenager I was married to. It scared the crap out of him and now things are a lot more equal at home. My husband actually quit his job because it didn't bring in that much money but required a lot of hours. We can live frugally on my income. He helps a lot more now-- all of this is to say, stand your ground ladies. Dad needs to help.

  2. It is much more balanced now and we have a whole house chore chart for child care 😅, and the grand parents watch my son 2 weekends out of the month. But thank you 😊 🙏🏽

  3. I’m in fortune 100 corporate America not non profit but one of our directors has young kids and is absolutely militant on them being her priority. She totally transparently blocks off time in her diary for kids sports games or recitals or whatever. She talks about them in high level meetings. From what she says, her husband does the same at his similarly prominent role. That’s not to say that she doesn’t take the evening calls and all the other demands of that position, but it has been a cultural game changer to have her in executive leadership. Just want to encourage you to do the same - in that kind of position, you have so much influence for the future and work/life balance of the working parents coming up ten years behind you - I highly encourage you to make the most of that!

  4. VP in healthcare here. Was a director for the first four years with my first kiddo. I am in a very family friendly organization, and have worked from home the last 2.5 years. We are very very busy - like there is never a moment to relax ever because someone somewhere needs something all the time. SO is a pretty involved dad but a lot of the mental load still falls on me to “remember all the things”. Things definitely got exponentially harder with the second kiddo. The workload is not double, it’s somehow more than that. I think it would be easier if we had consistent family help but everyone lives too far away to be daily or even weekly help. But then I see my two boys playing together or the older one caring for his little brother and it is worth every single second. As for work, I’ve gotten incredibly disciplined at time management and I get more done in a day now than I ever did pre-kids because I guard my time more zealously. I also have learned what really needs prioritized versus what I can not do or put off until someone politely inquired. That comes with time and learning your organization and the players. I perpetually feel like I don’t get everything done but I’ve gotten used to it by now. 😂

  5. VP at a very large bank. 3 kids - 6, 3 and 1. Mental gymnastics on the regular. I get the work done but when I disconnect, I truly shut it down. Daycare and heavy spouse support. Some days I’m in desperate need of a lobotomy, other days I’m Wonder Woman. No regrets 😊

  6. Same here. Director at a SaaS company, kids are 7, 5 and 1. Mental gymnastics is the perfect description. I have to force myself to carve out time when I’m really focused on work and not thinking how I need to order another box of wipes from Amazon. I often have to remind myself it won’t be like this forever. My team is flexible with me getting things done before and after “typical” work hours and I think that’s also key.

  7. I’m a director at a nonprofit. It’s very stressful. We have a 3.5 year old and I’m pregnant again. Im frequently overwhelmed but I guess there’s never really a good time to take a new job or to have another child.

  8. I’m also a NP Director and I have a 3.5 year old. I’m one and done but I can tell you that it kind of depends on the atmosphere and culture of your org. I assume YMCA is family friendly but you might want to wait three or four months after you start, spend some time observing, and then decide.

  9. Thank you for sharing! The atmosphere is definitely family friendly, everyone talks about their kids and they really encourage work life balance etc. and that’s a great idea of observing in the beginning! ❤️

  10. Director level with a 2 yr old. My boss luckily has a lot of kids so is way more understanding than someone who wouldn’t get it. I actually think a senior role like this makes life easier, I see entry level workers at my org tied to a phone or desk and as long as I’m getting all my work done, my team is good, and I’m still running all my meetings nothing else matters. Was clear about boundaries and hard outs, I do daycare pickup at 4 without fail but I’m willing to be off camera and on calls as needed 24/7. I manage a team and I’ve had a lot of women with small children so I feel responsible to also give them a good example of how to set boundaries and prioritize their family without taking a step back in the workplace.

  11. You sound like an amazing role model for the women in your org! 😻 thank you for sharing! Yes this position will come with a pay increase, and we have already planned to pay for some services around the house. It’s so great reading your story! Thanks again 💕✨

  12. I think given that it's your first year, you should see how the first year goes, then have the baby based on that evaluation. No one in the end can quantify the level of stress you'll have at this particular place.

  13. I’m senior director with two kids - 8 and 5. The hardest part for me is managing kids illnesses, childcare during the summers & days off school along side wanting to take time off to just be with them for the good times. With another adult in the mix that might make it easier. I probably miss bed time once a week but the seniority level makes it easier for me to skip out for an assembly or school event without anyone really noticing.

  14. I would complete it in Fall 2024 (depending on finishing field internship hour completion).. and that’s a good point, my mother has brought that up as well 😊. Thanks!

  15. Thank you for sharing!! I always appreciate a different perspective and I am definitely a fence sitter between 1 and done, and having a 2nd. 🤷🏽‍♀️ but thanks again 💕❤️

  16. Yes. I’m a Director about to hopefully be promoted to Senior Director at a very large tech company. Our first is 11 months. It has been very rewarding but also very stressful with work despite it being a pretty supportive culture. Running teams is tricky and I took a new team and projects a couple months before I was due which complicated things. I still haven’t taken all of my maternity leave. I took 8 weeks but worked intermittently thinking I’d get the additional 12 weeks uninterrupted. I do regret not taking it all at in the beginning and disconnecting. We are planning on having another but my fiancé stays home now and my mom helps a lot so a good support system is important.

  17. Senior leadership here, also married to an executive! We both work in very demanding orgs, but the key for us was setting expectations from day 1. My son was only 9 months old (now going to be 1 in a few days...!) And I made sure my company new where my priorities were before I accepted their offer. They were totally on board. It's been a few months and things are still going really well, and I am a more fulfilled person for my son! We do have a nanny that comes to watch him for part of the day, but the rest of the day is split between my husband and I. For context I work in venture capital, which is traditionally pretty "boys club".

  18. Go ahead mama! Thanks for sharing! 💕 I’m definitely going to set boundaries that my fam is priority! Also Happy 1st birthday to your little one 💕

  19. I'm a director of a research organization at a large national lab. I am 40, have a 2 year old and a 4 year old and am expecting in October. It's tough, but I have a very supportive manager. I have worked hard to create an expectation of work -life balance in my organization and advocate for my staff. I like to think I can set an example for my earlier career employees.

  20. Wow! I love to hear stories of pioneering women in their current orgs! Thanks for sharing 💕 Also, since I have 2 partners In the home, it is very helpful to share responsibility (I recognize I need to do better of asking for help before I feel things bubble over) and also my parents help by watching my son 2 weekends out of the month 😊

  21. I’m a Sr. Regional Director - I have a 3 yr old. My spouse is wonderfully engaged but also has a demanding career, we have full time daycare and I have a VP who is very supportive. Even with all that in place, my days/weeks can get crazy depending on deadlines. There is a lot of juggling, coordinating and strong time management skills are a must in our household. Once kid goes down to sleep, both my husband and I log in to work for another couple of hours.

  22. While I am not director level, Im on the senior leadership team at a JCC (just like a Y, but Jewish). I had my 3rd babe last year, exactly 1y after my hire date, and trying for a 4th right now. I say go for it!

  23. i’m a senior director/vp and have 3 under 4. go for it, sort it out, push yourself! the right org and the right team will help make it work for you.

  24. I was a Director. Motherhood and the pandemic made it impossible for me personally. We have no family support whatsoever and few friends. I’m back in an individual contributor role now. At this point I just need a paycheck, not “a career.”

  25. I am on the leadership team at a K-8 school. My son just turned 2 today and I had him my first year in the role. I am currently working on my EDS degree (post masters, and equivalent to the first half of my doctorate). I found out I was pregnant with our second child after I had already paid for my first term of my EDS 😅. Oops! She is due on the second day of the new school year…

  26. Omg wow! Y’all are kicking all of the ass! An amazing story! Thank you so much 💕✨ Also congratulations and I hope you the best in the rest of your pregnancy ❤️

  27. I am a senior director, and just took on a VP level role with a large consulting firm. I have two kids - 3 years and 8 months. I’ve set boundaries around hours, no meetings/work between 5 and 8pm, I am very focused and productive during day time hours, but most of all I have a very supportive spouse, who is willing to take on more responsibilities and work, especially when I travel for work (25-30%)

  28. Awesome mama! Thanks for sharing! And that definitely seems like a common theme that having support from a spouse or family or however is super critical in a lot of situations 💕

  29. VP at a mental health nonprofit with a 3 year old, was a director before that. I feel like it’s been hard, but manageable. The hardest parts are getting sick pretty regularly (daycare = constant runny noses and sharing germs with us) and feeling exhausted more often than not. We also don’t have any family in the area, so while we have some good friends, it’s mostly on us to figure stuff out.

  30. I am a director and I have an 8 mo old. I’m also a single mom. If the workplace is the right place for you, they’ll make it work. If it’s not like the job I left for my current one, then you’ll know rather quickly.

  31. A rockstar! Huge woot woots to you and all single moms for sure 💕 that’s a good point! The job seems very understanding with their current staff and have an overall culture of support and flexibility (so far)! Thank you for sharing 💕

  32. Not gonna lie....i am also ambitious in my career and had my 2nd 8 months ago. I've really been having a hard time. It may just be me. It's the first time I wish I could take a step back and work part time

  33. Lawyer/law firm executive and I work “part time” (law firm part time). Two kids - just about 3 and 1. My husband is also an executive but doesn’t have crazy hours and only travels about once a quarter.

  34. Thanks for sharing mama! I know I read that when kids are little it’s a tough time period but things do slowly get better with time and they become more independent… but also yesss I’m starting to see from different stories how important outsourcing will be to lessen the household chores. Thanks again 💕✨

  35. I was a VP at an organization similar to YMCA. It really depends on the leadership, but it is possible. I was there for 6 years (3 of them with a child) and it could have been more possible if some decisions from the CEO were more strategic. I’d plan on what is best for you and your family, and if the job doesn’t fit around that, get a new job. The masters program may be difficult with a toddler and a new pregnancy and a new job no matter the support you have, the second one hits different than the first 😵‍💫 Don’t take on more than you need to and you’ll know what’s right when it’s time!

  36. I accepted a promotion to director when I was (barely) pregnant, took a full year maternity leave, returned pregnant again (they’re 18 months apart), and have been back for nearly 2 years. They didn’t like it but the leave also gave others the chance to have acting promotions in my absence. I was put into our own next gen talent pool within 6 months of returning from my 2nd leave. Do not sacrifice your personal life for work. If you want another and it works for you and your (non traditional, but sounds cool) family that’s the only factor that matters.

  37. I'm a Director at a biotech company and have a nearly 4 yo. I'd say it's no different than any other position I've had...if anything it's easier than my prior roles, since when I was doing bench labwork I couldn't just leave, whereas now I'll be managing labwork (but have spent past 6 weeks mostly just hiring a team) and I wanted this role so I could more easily WFH sometimes. And as before, I often login to work after my daughter goes to bed. Which nowadays is at like 10-11pm after I should already be in bed!

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