Visually impaired people have software that will read them the text on the screen, so assuming it doesn't gain sentience and spares them, they'll have to listen to all the juicy details.
Exactly. I worked as an activity assistant at a Memory Care facility. One of the other activity assistants knew that her roommate has Covid ( this was when Covid first hit but still) but she went to work and spread it to everyone. 34 out of 37 residents were positive and 4 passed away. Over half of the staff was sick or refused to come to work. I was in the icu for four days. My example is extreme, but the elderly is much more susceptible to illness and because everyone interacts closely with one another, illness spreads so fast.
Oh, oh dear. I'm glad you're feeling better. I change adult diapers in a caretaker capacity(not memory care) and have had near vomit situationas like that. I don't have a problem cleaning people at all but some times it can get tough.
I honestly don’t know who can do this job. Props to people who do because it’s noble as hell, but I’m not having my hands full of 80 year old shit every day (spoken as a healthcare worker myself). Yikes.
Worked doing this for a year right after high school. The exact description in OP's post is very common (minus the vomit), and honestly... It's not super bad. You just get used to it like you would anything else which is disgusting at first.
Have you read the other reddit stories? Some truly legendary stories include jolly ranchers and swamp ass so bad, it rendered an operating room unusable for days
I’m an RN, and some advice to you: the most important person for a caregiver to take care of is themselves. If you are sick, take the time you need because you need to feel your best to give the best care. Part of taking care of others is making sure you are able to take care of them safely.
As a dad to a now 3 year old girl, I'll always remember my first nappy change when I thought well that's my relationship with vaginas irreparably changed forever. I knew about the whole front-to-back but was unaware how the more liquidy stuff can get right on up in there. My wife found this all very funny.
Not to mention he should be wearing a mask as well? I could be wrong, but in the state I work at the mask mandate is lifted for most places but still required in medical facilities
fyi most hospitals/nursing homes couldn’t give two shits if you’re sick or not. they pretty much bully you into coming in anyway and some places write you up for calling out sick. it’s fucked up, but it’s the truth.
DON'T GO TO WORK IF YOU ARE ILL WITH A COMMUNICABLE DISEASE, ESPECIALLY NOT WHEN YOU WILL WORK CLOSELY WITH PEOPLE WHO ARE AT EXTRA RISK. GOD-FUCKING-DAMN IT, HAVEN'T WE LEARNED ANYTHING FROM THE PANDEMIC?
I'm confused as to how OP and so many people here don't realise how fucked up it is to go to work with stomach flue into a senior center. Like seriously OP wtf.
I scrolled too far to see this. If someone is sick at work, I’m pissed. I have a baby and a toddler, and if you spread your sickness to my family, you cause me so much trouble. I thought we learned from the pandemic that we don’t go to work sick! If your boss forces to go work, then I understand this is different, but this person didn’t even try to stay home.
Goes to work while ill, doesn't wear a mask, apparently cleaned a vagina with his faces inches away from it and wasn't able to keep his mouse closed for long enough to direct the vomit elsewhere.
Right? I worked in skilled nursing facilities for years and they would never have male employee do perineal care on a female patient/resident. Even if he was gay. This is total BS.
Good job being selfish by putting your residents lives at risk by being sick and going to work. Your sickness can kill them. So lesson one, don’t go to work if you’re sick SPECIFICALLY where you work!
This story is horrifying, but TBH more horrifying is the prospect of suffering from Alzheimer's and not being able to go to the bathroom yourself and having to sit in your own urine/feces until someone comes to change you.
I vomited. I know I should have felt it coming and turned away. But I didn't. The vomit happened suddenly and without warning. And it went onto and into her vagina.
I had a similar situation happen to me. I had been working at a memory care facility for about 7 months, so I was used to all the bodily fluids so they honestly didn't bother me. One morning I came in for my 12 hour shift and my stomach wasn't sitting right. I figured it was because I had coffee and still showed up. Well 4 hours into my shift and I'm just feeling worse. I had to go bring a lady out for lunch and when I walked into her room there was poop everywhere. She had an accident and then started walking in it. It was all over her, on the walls, on the sink and floor. I called my coworker to help me clean it up but the second time I walked in there I couldn't handle it. I apologized to her and ran to the staff bathroom and started puking. I went home early and ended up on the couch for 3 days with a fever and vomiting. So yes, please stay home if you're sick
I'm just wondering at what point do we decide its not worth keeping someone alive. They have no recollection of anything that is going on. Isn't it inhumane to keep them alive what is the purpose of this job?
When I first started nursing school I would gag every time I cleaned a patient. I felt terrible about it, but obviously I couldn't help it. Then lucky me, because if there is a God he loves to test me, I had a patient with C-diff who would poop constant liquid rivers....the ones where you change them and by the time you are done you HAVE to change them again. I just stared, gagging, at the patient because I had no idea what to do. I've gotten an iron stomach now though so nothing phases me anymore 😆
At least now any time you’re feeling ill and need to miss work you can just refer to the Vagina Vomit incident if your boss wants you to come in anyway.
I remember on an ems call we went to an apartment where this old lady had fallen down and couldn't get up so she shat herself. I don't know how, but shit was on a huge radius arouns her.
I know that somewhere, someone read this and jerked off because it hit a particular fetish they probably didn't know they had. That's the world we live in. It's not a bad place, just kind of weird sometimes.
How do you clean the inside of a vagina without fingering/scraping, then maybe power washing? I own one but have only ever cleaned my own and it was not poo filled so am confused on how to do this with wet wipes and gentle motions.
TIFU (97 M) BY HAVING THE SEXIEST SEX THAT EVER SEXED (112 F). I SEX AND THEN SEX BAD. VAGINA WEINER SEX. IT WAS A SEX AND THEN I VOMITED ON NUTS AFTER THE SEX. VAGINAAAAAAAAAAA PUKE SEX.
i just left work early because i also have a stomach thing and was dry heaving in the lab. i get home, crawl into bed, open reddit, and this is the very first post i see. life is insane
Pro tip for those who struggle with the smell. Wear two surgical masks and put some toothpaste between the two masks. If the sight is what gets you I dont have advice for that
Y’all aren’t wearing masks while doing this!? Not only are we still in a pandemic, but a mask would have helped the smell and kept the vomit from traveling.
This is the first time ive retched myself while seeing/reading something on the internet. I couldnt even finish your story. I applaud the job youre doing, knowing i could never do it myself, and i hope that sometime in the very near future this kind of jobs get a 200% pay raise
You won't know you have. It's fine.
If I get to this point someone better shoot me
I can only hope someone will have the decency to put me out of my misery, if I ever become a gomer
Which is why euthanasia should be legal
Yup, as a man, when people start vomiting on my vagina, fucking shoot me
That's nice
What a day to have eyes
What a day to be able to read and understand English.
Visually impaired people have software that will read them the text on the screen, so assuming it doesn't gain sentience and spares them, they'll have to listen to all the juicy details.
Aged care nurse here. Never ever go to work sick. You don't want to be one that infects a whole wing with gastro. No one will like you.
[удалено]
Exactly. I worked as an activity assistant at a Memory Care facility. One of the other activity assistants knew that her roommate has Covid ( this was when Covid first hit but still) but she went to work and spread it to everyone. 34 out of 37 residents were positive and 4 passed away. Over half of the staff was sick or refused to come to work. I was in the icu for four days. My example is extreme, but the elderly is much more susceptible to illness and because everyone interacts closely with one another, illness spreads so fast.
That's nice.
If this fucking pandemic has taught us anything;
Exactly, really fucked up to go to work sick around a bunch of old people. You could be directly responsible for a death.
You’ll also kill people with that.
That’s nice.
“THATS NICE.”
That last “that’s nice” had me rolling
OMG Same here! I can’t stop laughing 🤣 this is quality material!!
it's so funny that it seems made up, but you can't make stuff like this up
Feels like a gag from a sitcom.
Twas the moment I gave my upvote
The loudest laugh escaped me. I can’t…my sides 😅
instant Reddit classic quote.
Had to scroll down to find this cause I was in tears laughing so hard.
For some reason I saw it coming like as if it was written for it to be funny
Oh, oh dear. I'm glad you're feeling better. I change adult diapers in a caretaker capacity(not memory care) and have had near vomit situationas like that. I don't have a problem cleaning people at all but some times it can get tough.
I honestly don’t know who can do this job. Props to people who do because it’s noble as hell, but I’m not having my hands full of 80 year old shit every day (spoken as a healthcare worker myself). Yikes.
The c diff and lactulose shits are the worst ever... Never forget the smell.
Good lord this is easily one of the most disgusting things I have ever read
I assume no one on here has introduced to the “Swamps of Dagobah” tale yet.
My job here is done. Be glad you didn't have to live it.
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Worked doing this for a year right after high school. The exact description in OP's post is very common (minus the vomit), and honestly... It's not super bad. You just get used to it like you would anything else which is disgusting at first.
Tbh as a caregiver, I have had to deal with shit (pun intended) like this on a regular basis. This kinda thing is par for the course
Have you read the other reddit stories? Some truly legendary stories include jolly ranchers and swamp ass so bad, it rendered an operating room unusable for days
I’m going to delete Reddit after this. Peace guys
That's nice
This isn't even top 10 of disgusting things I've read on Reddit. you'll be back
I’m an RN, and some advice to you: the most important person for a caregiver to take care of is themselves. If you are sick, take the time you need because you need to feel your best to give the best care. Part of taking care of others is making sure you are able to take care of them safely.
Sounds like a shitty day
It really, really was.
That's nice
sips coffee while reading about shitty vaginas........
A pukey day is almost always a shitty day as well.
And vomitty.
Thats nice
Enough to make you sick
That's nice!
Believe me when I tell you that it was not nice.
I’m so excited to see this go meta into other posts. I’ll know what people are talking about.
I wear glasses, so effectively I’ve paid to read this and mentally scar myself.
LASIK here. I paid $4,850 for this post!
You poor thing lol!
As a dad to a now 3 year old girl, I'll always remember my first nappy change when I thought well that's my relationship with vaginas irreparably changed forever. I knew about the whole front-to-back but was unaware how the more liquidy stuff can get right on up in there. My wife found this all very funny.
That's nice.
As a fellow vagina owner… you’ve had poo in your pum pum? I thought we all wiped front to back ???
Oh my god, that's...
Yeah. The one consolation I have is that she didn't realise it happened.
Into? Or onto? Huge difference.
Soo many questions (I worked in elderly care with quite a few incontinent female patients)
Right like the vagina isn’t just an open bowl
Not to mention he should be wearing a mask as well? I could be wrong, but in the state I work at the mask mandate is lifted for most places but still required in medical facilities
I'm glad I wasn't the only one who was horrified by this idea. I'm thinking that he just means labia and not vagina. At least I am fucking praying
It’s easy when it’s a made up story. A funny one though
No offense..... But going into a caretaker job while sick is gross negligence.
And his poor boss had to clean up the shitstorm and this guy's puke
Going into work sick. Around high risk patients. In the healthcare field. While not wearing a mask. Proceeds to VOMIT into a clients porous orifice.
fyi most hospitals/nursing homes couldn’t give two shits if you’re sick or not. they pretty much bully you into coming in anyway and some places write you up for calling out sick. it’s fucked up, but it’s the truth.
Why would you think it's ok to go to work feeling ill at all when working with elderly and most likely immunocompromised people?
DON'T GO TO WORK IF YOU ARE ILL WITH A COMMUNICABLE DISEASE, ESPECIALLY NOT WHEN YOU WILL WORK CLOSELY WITH PEOPLE WHO ARE AT EXTRA RISK. GOD-FUCKING-DAMN IT, HAVEN'T WE LEARNED ANYTHING FROM THE PANDEMIC?
Thank you 🙏
Not just because of the pandemic... Where I'm from this is a very basic legal requirement if you are working in care.
I'm confused as to how OP and so many people here don't realise how fucked up it is to go to work with stomach flue into a senior center. Like seriously OP wtf.
I scrolled too far to see this. If someone is sick at work, I’m pissed. I have a baby and a toddler, and if you spread your sickness to my family, you cause me so much trouble. I thought we learned from the pandemic that we don’t go to work sick! If your boss forces to go work, then I understand this is different, but this person didn’t even try to stay home.
This. Wtf is wrong with OP (and people in general) When I worked in restaurants you weren’t allowed to come in if you had any such issues.
Goes to work while ill, doesn't wear a mask, apparently cleaned a vagina with his faces inches away from it and wasn't able to keep his mouse closed for long enough to direct the vomit elsewhere.
I don't believe this story at all
Yeah, vaginas are just gaping and vomit can just pour into it…
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It totally seems like "legendary reddit story" bait. It was kinda believable at first, then the "that's nice" made me 100% not believe it at all.
Nope! Not buying it.🤣🤣🤣
Thr last "thats nice" is what made it unbelievable for me
Right? I worked in skilled nursing facilities for years and they would never have male employee do perineal care on a female patient/resident. Even if he was gay. This is total BS.
Why didnt u have a mask
Because it didn't really happen.
What’s a worst impression? Not going into work to not risk infecting immune compromised patients or going into work and vomiting on one?
You have a future writing click-bait headlines
I'm dead... I shouldn't of laughed. I really shouldn't have, but fuck....I couldn't help it. It was the "that's nice" response.
Comedic gold.
Same, glad to see I'm not alone xD
"Shouldn't of"
You DO NOT GO TO WORK SICK. Especially with old age care.
Not to question the validity of your awesomely graphic story...
I miss 5 minutes ago when I did not read this
That's nice
Good job being selfish by putting your residents lives at risk by being sick and going to work. Your sickness can kill them. So lesson one, don’t go to work if you’re sick SPECIFICALLY where you work!
I REALLY hope you meant vulva and not vagina
This. Vaginas are pretty delicate things and having actual vomit inside one is bad news for the lady concerned.
This story is horrifying, but TBH more horrifying is the prospect of suffering from Alzheimer's and not being able to go to the bathroom yourself and having to sit in your own urine/feces until someone comes to change you.
The real fuck up was going in sick when you WORK WITH THE ELDERLY.
By the time their memory is this gone, they can't process English sentences all that much. Instead of
Eh, I'm pretty sure this story is super made up.
I vomited. I know I should have felt it coming and turned away. But I didn't. The vomit happened suddenly and without warning. And it went onto and into her vagina.
I really respect that after all that you still went back. You're awesome! (and so is your boss if this is anything to go by)
About as graceful a reaction from all parties as there could possibly be.
That's nice
I had a similar situation happen to me. I had been working at a memory care facility for about 7 months, so I was used to all the bodily fluids so they honestly didn't bother me. One morning I came in for my 12 hour shift and my stomach wasn't sitting right. I figured it was because I had coffee and still showed up. Well 4 hours into my shift and I'm just feeling worse. I had to go bring a lady out for lunch and when I walked into her room there was poop everywhere. She had an accident and then started walking in it. It was all over her, on the walls, on the sink and floor. I called my coworker to help me clean it up but the second time I walked in there I couldn't handle it. I apologized to her and ran to the staff bathroom and started puking. I went home early and ended up on the couch for 3 days with a fever and vomiting. So yes, please stay home if you're sick
“Georgia had messed herself.”
Finally found a job worse than working retail
I did the same thing at my 21st birthday party but she was 20 so not as sexy as 92.
Okay okay , explain further lol
So....is this one of those "She's my wife today" stories or..?
"Hey, can you find a title that will absolutely, 100% stop pretty much everyone from reading the details"
You win grossest title on tifu
its deleted😔 tell me someone archived it PLEASE
I think we were inadvertently saved... im gonna go buy a lotto hbu?
That's nice
I'm just wondering at what point do we decide its not worth keeping someone alive. They have no recollection of anything that is going on. Isn't it inhumane to keep them alive what is the purpose of this job?
Why the fuck would you go to work with any sickness especially working with old old people
That was brutal
When I first started nursing school I would gag every time I cleaned a patient. I felt terrible about it, but obviously I couldn't help it. Then lucky me, because if there is a God he loves to test me, I had a patient with C-diff who would poop constant liquid rivers....the ones where you change them and by the time you are done you HAVE to change them again. I just stared, gagging, at the patient because I had no idea what to do. I've gotten an iron stomach now though so nothing phases me anymore 😆
I pray to the god of reddit that this is just some fiction written by some bored naked Indonesian guy with his dick hanging out.
50% of this subreddit is just creative writing practice. This is one of those posts.
I’ve seen similar things happen in person so it’s entirely possible.
It's a good thing you got throught it and keep working there.
Thats nice
Holy shit I was not expecting to read that title on my Reddit home page 😂😂😂😂 this is fucking hilarious
DEAR EVERYBODY.
Did you learn to wipe women? You could have given her a bad UTI/infection with making the poop go into the vagina
I'm not editing that post. But sorry for the many typoes.
Every person who’s worked in a care facility knows the story is BS lol.
Man.. the post is gone.. I really wanted to know the story here.
It must be back because I just read it. I regret reading it, but it's there.
At least now any time you’re feeling ill and need to miss work you can just refer to the Vagina Vomit incident if your boss wants you to come in anyway.
I was sitting here reading this knowing what was coming and thinking to myself "oh please pleaseeee let Georgia say it". Was not disappointed lol.
Honestly this reads like a Chuck Palahniuk short. “That’s nice.” Great storytelling 😂
Hope she's on antibiotics, that would be one hell of a UTI...
I remember on an ems call we went to an apartment where this old lady had fallen down and couldn't get up so she shat herself. I don't know how, but shit was on a huge radius arouns her.
That's nice.
I’m logging off for the day bruh
That’s nice.
Healthcare: don’t come to work if you’re sick :)
That's nice.
That's nice.
The gay community should forget the myth that all straight men find vulvas attractive. I’m not even sure a majority do.
That's nice.
What I don’t understand is why
That’s nice.
I’ve worked in the industry a long time. I don’t believe this for a min.
I didn't read this but I will not believe it Edit: I read it and now I'm vomiting into grandmas puss
Load of bull, you would be wearing a mask and have a face full of puke if you did puke.
Thanks I hate it, kinda calling bs tho. Wouldn’t you be wearing a mask? Unless it’s an old story in which case why post now. Good writing tho
I know that somewhere, someone read this and jerked off because it hit a particular fetish they probably didn't know they had. That's the world we live in. It's not a bad place, just kind of weird sometimes.
Need to work on your setup a bit, as I could see the punchline miles away.
How do you clean the inside of a vagina without fingering/scraping, then maybe power washing? I own one but have only ever cleaned my own and it was not poo filled so am confused on how to do this with wet wipes and gentle motions.
Don't you use facemasks? Something is missing in this story
TIFU (97 M) BY HAVING THE SEXIEST SEX THAT EVER SEXED (112 F). I SEX AND THEN SEX BAD. VAGINA WEINER SEX. IT WAS A SEX AND THEN I VOMITED ON NUTS AFTER THE SEX. VAGINAAAAAAAAAAA PUKE SEX.
Vaginas don't have a big gaping hole that allows spew in
I read that title and went straight to nope. Eye bleach, please.
This is def the worst TIFU I've read and am now regretful for clicking on it.... thanks man.
This is a horrible tldr
i just left work early because i also have a stomach thing and was dry heaving in the lab. i get home, crawl into bed, open reddit, and this is the very first post i see. life is insane
I am so impressed by your boss. She’s an angel.
Come back and talk to me when you had this same experience except with your own mother. Then we can talk.
That's nice.
I came in here expecting to read something disgusting.
What did it say? Its deleted now
I don't know where you are but here it's the morning and you have ruined mine. That's nice.
One of the worst jobs in all of society and doesn’t pay nearly enough
You went to work in senior center, while sick, and didn't wear a mask? i know this isn't that sub, but YTA.
Thats nice
I don’t know what they pay senior care people, but I know it’s not enough
Pro tip for those who struggle with the smell. Wear two surgical masks and put some toothpaste between the two masks. If the sight is what gets you I dont have advice for that
That's nice.
my life was better before i read this
Tifu by me reading title and racing to read story
That's nice
Well, when your first experience with a vagina there's no coming back. We lost another one, bois. (I'm just joking)
I'm an RN and I was an aid before that. It'll get easier.
Sounds like your boss is awesome.
Y’all aren’t wearing masks while doing this!? Not only are we still in a pandemic, but a mask would have helped the smell and kept the vomit from traveling.
That's nice!
This is the first time ive retched myself while seeing/reading something on the internet. I couldnt even finish your story. I applaud the job youre doing, knowing i could never do it myself, and i hope that sometime in the very near future this kind of jobs get a 200% pay raise
That's nice :)
I’m going to somewhere now and try to forget I ever read this.
That's a nice story thank you Georgia
That is quite the title.