1. Tried to play D&D all day but one of my players got kidnapped by his pro-royalist parents to take them to and accompany them at obligatory mourning. Since he was pretty crucial to the unfolding plot, the rest of us just sat on call and got drunk.

  2. Watched the entire spectacle for hours and trawled Twitter for unhinged comments by the ‘this isn’t misogyny, it’s tradition!’ set because—for my sins—this is Very Relevant to My Doctoral Thesis.

  3. Spent the whole day in bed with the missus watching House of Dragon and Succession, got takeaway and didn’t step outside once. Saw nothing of the funeral. Haven’t had a day like that in months and it was brilliant.

  4. Had a riveting day of modded Minecraft, just managed to not fall dramatically to the ground weeping like a heroine in a Jane Austin novel.

  5. I'm french, our news about it all day since one week, majors politics meeting and annoucement were put on hold...

  6. Napped a lot, some self gratification, snacked on stuff, then showered, went down town playing Pokemon Go, then to Asda for groceries at 8pm (reduced section was lacking as store had only been open for a few hours), divved about on the way home, got home, had meat free steak slices and grapes for dinner, felt sleepy and went to bed.

  7. Walked the dogs, had a wank, painted the bathroom ceiling, had a wank, painted the kitchen ceiling, had a wank, hoovered the lounge, had a wank, walked the dogs again, had a wank, had tea, had a wank, washed the pots, had a wank, showered and wanked then went to bed. Had sex with the wife. I have a sore knob now.

  8. Slept until midday, cleaned the bathroom, did a clothes wash, cleaned the kitchen, bought a new strap-on harness, hoovered the bedroom, watched TV, ate an absurd amount of gnocchi for dinner.

  9. Fitted a new radiator for my tenant and went to the pub for lunch. Kept my mind off the fact that, last week, we lost a folk music icon and my wife's aunt, bracketing my late first wife's birthday, so really not feeling that involved in other people's sorrows.

  10. Went for a run at bang on 11 and didn't see a single other person, absolutely blissful. Then ate a big portion of lasagne and drank lots of red wine. Very very sad indeed, worst day of my entire life by far.

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