1. There are visa routes for you to live in the US or him to live in your country. People do it. You just need to read up on the requirements. In most cases, citizenship is a very last step after you’ve already been living there on a visa. So don’t worry about citizenship.

  2. I'm worried because if we are compatible, I am the one to do the moving aka I would be staying. I am nervous. I am afraid of being miserably homesick. I am afraid of letting him down. If I can't acclimate, if this fear persists, if I truly don't want to be the one to move, my relationship is doomed to end.

  3. That could happen. Sometimes relationships end for all sorts of reasons. You’d survive it in the big picture. Many times it works out though, you may spend that time in Australia and love it!

  4. Yikes, me and my partner are also US to UK and hoping to close the distance permanently sometime soon, and this is really discouraging to hear. I wish the immigration process wasn't so damn complicated and expensive, but for them to waste your time and 4k like that? Not something I look forward to dealing with. At least in the meantime I have a working holiday visa allowing me to stay in Ireland for up to a year, where both of us can spend an extended time together since UK citizens are free to live there, but idk what will be the next step.

  5. Just be sure you’re extra clear what route you’re using and what requirements they have. A really good resource to research and ask questions so you are absolutely clear is

  6. It sounds like you accidentally applied for a family visa on the fiancée route rather than a marriage visitor visa. They are two different things with two different requirements. The things they listed in your rejection sound more in line with the fiancée visa than marriage visitor visa. The only other thing I can think of with the marriage visitor visa is you have to send in proof of intent to marry - was that included? That may also be what they are referring to. Either that or home office made an error processing you as a fiancée visa applicant rather than marriage visitor.

  7. I won’t say this is the only way it can work but this is how my SO and I are and it made LDR not a huge big struggle like some have. It was not easy but it wasn’t hard for us, we were ok when in LDR. We mostly closed the distance now (were US-UK but now both in the UK in different towns). We’ve been a couple 6 years in total and all going well but I think a huge part of it has been that we’re both very independent individuals with our own lives who have joined together.

  8. Chat with friends or family or therapist or journal or sleep

  9. That is your phone. She shouldn't be touching it.

  10. Telegram has the ability to delete messages for both parties. She doesn’t need to touch his phone. She chooses the message on her phone, clicks “delete for both” and it will remove it for both people.

  11. There’s not much to make it easier, tbh. The only one main thing that helped me was thinking of it this way: this is one small bump in the longer term big picture of our whole relationship. Looking back from the future it will be just a little blip. It helped me keep things in perspective but it was still never easy.

  12. We were US-UK and we met twice a year for two weeks at a time. Did that for 3.5 years before I moved from the US to the UK on a work visa a little over 2.5 years ago.

  13. There should be an address in the paperwork/application that is the scanning hub or an office listed. I think it’s usually in New York. You’ll send all your documents there. It will get scanned there or get to the right people.

  14. When you haven’t met in person, yeah it’s way too soon.

  15. I know I definitely need work. The problem, I have so many issues I don’t even know where to start. I just doubt I’ll be a good husband at my current state. The question is if I’m fixable. Sadly I can’t even afford a therapist!

  16. I’ve never had that white hot anger feeling toward my SO where I just want to end it. I think you deserve to be in a relationship and with a person who isn’t petty and jealous. I don’t think the issue is really you here.

  17. I would just laugh it off and move on. Who cares what she thinks? What was the purpose of your boyfriend telling you this?

  18. It was not even an option for me to not keep it is the problem. I never paid extra for that service.

  19. So did you get your passport back but it didn’t have a vignette in it? Or you never sent your passport off after the biometric appointment? There would have been paperwork when you applied which explained how to get your passport to the office.

  20. I showed them my passport at my biometrics appointment, but they never asked for it for anything. They only used it as ID. I never got paperwork stating where to send it.

  21. The address and instructions to send your passport would have been in the application stuff, one of the pages to save/print out at the time you applied, or they should have given a page with instructions to you at the appointment.

  22. I think it's both of them because that girl is enjoying the attention she is getting. Plus no girl would spend 15-16 lac by her own to open a salon with someone they only for 2-3 years.

  23. I just want to know what should I do I mean 6 months is a long time. Because I was suffering mentally. I made efforts from my side

  24. Yeah like I said, I would end this relationship based on how he has behaved. 6 months of this is a long time and you are worth more than that.

  25. Yep. I get you 100% on all this down to “oh you kids wouldn’t eat healthy food when I tried”. My sister is overweight too and has a 1 1/2 year old. We recently visited home and the toddler was drinking water and my mom was like “oh wow, I’m impressed, you guys wouldn’t drink water at that age” and my sister and I tried so hard not to roll our eyes right then and there. Like my sister’s kid doesn’t even know what juice is or that it is an option. She will drink water if that is what is given to her and she’s thirsty and doesn’t know any different, she’s a baby!

  26. Very generally discussed it or at least looked at it being a possibility before we even progressed to meeting in person because there was no point to furthering the relationship if we didn’t have a realistic way for one or the other to move. So that happened maybe 3 months in, but we were international so it was more complex.

  27. Video calls during which we did a variety of things: online board games just the two of us or with mutual friends, video games, watching a variety of tv shows, watching movies, watching/discussing documentaries, watching YouTube, taking virtual museum tours or “travelling” with google street view, playing trivia/quiz games; chatting while doing all of that.

  28. The virtual museum tours are a great idea, i’m stealing that. Thank you :) any recommendations?

  29. I can’t remember now, it was a while ago when we did that but I know there’s a lot of lists online because it was popular during lockdowns.

  30. Yep, unfortunate major reality of international LDR

  31. Wow, thank ou for a really detailed response :) I appreciate it!

  32. yes our plan is living somewhere in northern york in the countryside in a small cottage! we’ve given eachother plenty of ideas of what the rooms will look like

  33. Countryside homes are usually super expensive, even small cottages. But it’s always nice to look and dream. Best of luck to you in achieving your goals!

  34. Can I ask where you found the visa to apply and what documents you have to submit for proof of relationship?? My fiancé and I are trying to figure out the process and are having a hard time.

  35. We’ve been on the UK website a bunch, but kept getting rerouted to pages that didn’t make sense and going in circles. Thanks for the advice

  36. It may be because they put several paths of family visa in one place so you have to parse out what makes sense for your path. I do encourage you to make a fresh post and then people can give you the clearer step by step, they are very knowledgable here! :)

  37. That's honestly what I was just hoping for yesterday. If he didn't like that I surprised him that way, he could have just let me in and told me. Not text me and tell me to go home because he doesn't want to see me. And lie to me. I don't know what's wrong with me that I still have feelings for this dude and crying over him right now.

  38. Breakups suck!! It’s ok to be sad. Give yourself some time and go easy on yourself. It will take time but you’ll feel better eventually. Hope for you that someone lovely who treats you very well comes along and that you don’t go for any less than that!

  39. I took 2 busses and a train to see my ex and I brought him coffee and doughnuts. He didn't pick up or answer the door. So I left it at his door, and let his roommate know to make sure he eats the doughnuts. He got mad at me for talking to his roommate.

  40. What do you mean with it being a her problems? And yeah I can’t comprehend how she could throw away a year of talking like it was nothing to her. No attempt to reconcile even if there was a problem. I just wish I knew why. It just baffles me how no signs were present or I was too blind to see it. Thank you though it does mean a lot

  41. I just meant that you’re looking at what you could do or did do or didn’t do but the issue is her, not you. There’s probably not any particular thing you could have done, some people just have issues. She needs to work through whatever that is that caused her to do this.

  42. Sorry this happened. You’re wondering what you did but from what I can tell, this sounds like a her problem - especially with the whole Instagram thing and putting up that caption and ghosting you. Sometimes it’s not something you did or didn’t do.

  43. The issue we’re running into is proving our relationship. We haven’t lived together or shared finances and it seems that’s the biggest thing they want to see.

  44. I wouldn’t stress it if it’s just one off day here or there, could be he’s busy with something or he’s just feeling mentally off or whatever. If it’s ongoing for a little while where things feel different/off the usual communication patterns then I’d just say that things seem different in the communication lately and just want to see if everything is ok.

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