1. When I was 30 and had a 1 year old at home and didn’t have a single second to myself, I had a much older colleague give me some advice that kept me sane:

  2. My Linkedin is my Linkedin. I just refuse to change it from a previous employer. If I have to quit a job that insists I change my LI, I will. That’s true whether I have 1 job or 2. But my LI is my account not my employer account. Period. I don’t give them access ever or allow them to market from my account. I block snoopy managers who check up to see if I changed/updated my LI.

  3. I think it’s very sweet that you are moved by his passing. It also seems natural. I’m really sorry. I say let yourself feel the pain.

  4. I don’t think so. It was a pre paid card and not an actual credit card. I imagine they didn’t realize they didn’t have enough to tip until it was too late. I’d like to think that they went back with cash at some point. I know that I would have.

  5. I love your optimism (I mean that sincerely). I like that you think the best in people. I tend to think that 90% of people believe they’re good people but when the chips are down they choose themselves. (If it were me, I’d have Venmo’d the server their tip).

  6. The 40s were an outlier for me so it’s hard to compare. My story: At age 41 I had my best season in sports ever (batted over .900 in competitive softball while making diving catches in the outfield, lots of touchdown receptions and interceptions in competitive flag football league, did well in pick-up basketball at the park) and also my best earning year life (nearly 300K during The Great Recession). Then I was unexpectedly hit with a fluke health issue that nearly cost me my life (it didn’t!!) and had long-term health issues (chronic fatigue, etc.). So my 40s started great, but then ended up being about regaining my health and career before my wife dumped me at 50. I have a hard time believing your 40s will be like that, thank goodness!

  7. I’m glad it was helpful. He’s lucky to have a person like you who cares. I wish you both all the best.

  8. I think it’s such a sh*tty thing to take out a bad mood on a partner.

  9. I once (14 years ago, at age 42) drove 16 hours round trip to meet my then-wife for sex when she was on a weekend trip.

  10. Honestly really poor parenting here. Give her double the normal interest rate. Really teach her a lesson about how fucked the economy is rn so she can better adapt. No pain no gain. Positive vibes!!! /s

  11. Listen. Our kids should ideally grow up safer than us. Balancing that with being able to teach them responsibility is something you’re actively trying to do. I respect anyone that tries to balance those two aspects of life out. You should be proud of yourself

  12. I don’t get why they all feel the need to say that too. Like in their heads they want to be an awesome and loved leader so they constantly have to tell everyone they don’t micromanage. Oddly enough though the worst micromanager I had straight up told me on my first day he’s a micromanaging high pressure control freak 

  13. Such a blessing that manager is — I love people who are honest early on!

  14. I literally only use my laptop, cellphone, airpods and a desk. That’s all I’ve ever used for home offices dating back to 2006.

  15. I think younger women are more accepting of bisexuality than older, however.

  16. I like this point. My daughters are in their 20s and my stepdaughter in her teens, and any kind of fluidity in gender or attraction doesn’t phase them (and their social circles) at all. Of course we’re in a liberal city; not all locations are the same.

  17. I am 100 percent monogamous, loyal and faithful. I even turn my eyes away from nude women in movies. 😂

  18. Yes, i will be paying almost 40 to 50% of my income in child and spousal support, as she never worked during our marriage and now considered un-employable because she doesn’t have skills

  19. It sucks to pay alimony but I also I found that life is much cheaper after my divorce. I pay alimony and that’s it. Before my wife didn’t earn but had unlimited power to spend freely, and getting her to stick to a budget was impossible. Now I have reasonable fun money and still my savings and portfolio are growing because my ex can’t spend it all like she used to. I work two jobs from time to time to pad my coffers (portfolio).

  20. The world is your oyster, get yourself a fresh 20 year old and don’t get her pregnant.

  21. I was afraid for years. Thought I would be betraying my (now ex) wife, kids and vows.

  22. I think it’s heartwarming you’re both working to save the marriage. I’d give her another chance, but maybe not yet. 9 weeks sober isn’t very long. I’d want her to focus longer on the sober part while being her advocate. I’d take it slow for everyone’s sake.

  23. You’ve had a lot of trauma. Give your self more time to heal physically and emotionally before worrying too much about this.

  24. The silent treatment is a common technique used by narcissists. It’s considered to be emotional abuse.

  25. This makes sense! My ex wife would do that. It was like I was totally invisible sometimes. Since our divorce she has totally ignored our (20s) kids — moved to another state and is poof gone.

  26. I felt that way. Especially since in my experience serious relationships added stress and burden and the best part (sex) fizzled out after the honeymoon period.

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